for now im pretty content with where im at, friends, family, well I mean lifewise lol. I'm still totally scared of what I have to do and what im going to do, whatever that should be. I'm afraid of losing my friends and family but thats just how it is now. I'm always scared now but still content for the moment.
I'm having fun right now just living. Not having to really worry about anything until I get my license, job, etc. But yah I think im doing the right thing for me, college, well I just had to think about it for a while and decided it just really wasnt for me. I don't want to waste my time anymore on things that wont even matter in the end. I need to enjoy who and what I have right now and just do things that are right for me.
Always trying to live up to your friends, family, and teachers standards just isnt going to cut it in the end. I always thought that yeah I would be the one to go to college, try to get a high paying career but thats really only because my friends and teachers were pushing me to do so. I never once really asked myself, hey nicole is this what you want. When really is isnt. I've always just wanted to be happy with friends and family around not striving to be materialistic and after money or a pretentious standing. Just be happy.
So im going to do whats right for myself and just live my life. A lot of people are not really a part of my life anymore but im okay with that now.
sorry for the rant.
peace.
"when the truth is I miss you"- Coldplay
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